Remenber Me

When u feelin' that winds blowin ur hairs..

that's me..,

When u feelin that winds running faster..

maybe I'm Mad.., 

When u feelin that winds go away..

maybe I'm sad.., 

When u smiling arrounds the winds..

I'm the one who watch u between the leafs.., 

I'm touchin u with this winds.., 

Remember me as me..

as winds..

coz I'm Windy n u r not dust.

Always My Skies

On my way for buying dinner. We've never expected that sky has a beautiful surprise on my head. We've just to be more sensitive with around us, on top, behind, between, even under our feet. ^_^

On the bus when on my way from my hometown with some friends....

NONE

None will love me when I'm crying..

None will love me when I'm smiling or even laughing...

None will love me when I'm walking...

None will love me when I'm talking..

None will love me just the way I am..

Stupid thing when thinking someone will love me just the way I am...

Someone will love me when I'm crying, smiling, laughing, walking, talking..

None will love because NONE WILL...

Konyol tapi Mengaggumkan

So, I found this feeling and it's great and it's so clear and it's so bright ... pokonya sangat melegakan. 

Yah.. akhirnya setelah merasa bahwa aq ga sanggup ga bicara, ga ngobrol, chatting taw apaun itu namanya ternyata salah besarrrrrrrrrrrr...haha

Couple days ago when I saw his light green there was something that pulled me to talk to him. Because I thought that I missed him and it was not wrong to back talk to him again and started from first but before that I was in a condition "should I? or shouldn't I?"-dilemma tingkat tinggi antara gengsi dan keinginan untuk mengobrol. You can think what happen next because it's obviously clear that I kicked away that stupid feelings and started talk "Hi" to him.....

God Damn! My heart was totally jumping that time, it was closely on the floor when he back said "heyy". Then I said "wassup?" then he answered then he asked me back then I lost my feeling to talk with him anymore.. Suddenly bored. Sssumpah ga taw apa yang mesti di omongin lagi..padahal kan awalnya keukeuh nih si aq ga bisa ga ngobrol ama dia tapi buktinya setelah itu ..emang ga ada hal yang patut di obrolin. Apa coba..tiba-tiba sekarang pendapat itu lenyap dan sekarang nih ga ada keinginan besar wat ngobrol sama dia lagi. 

Emang konyol sih..nggak nyangka malah jadinya kayak gini. Ini tuh mengaggumkan karena emang jadi plong dan jadi ga perlu takut lagi wat -omigod- dia lupa sama aq. 

legggaaaaaa bangettt....

leggaaa....

Satu hal yang aq dapet dari kejadian ini adalah rasa takut untuk mencoba emang sulit buat di ilangin tapi kalo kita emang punya niat yang kuat kita bakal ga takut untuk mencoba apapun hasilnya nanti dan yang aq lakukan selama ini hanya takut untuk bicara ngomong padahal itu ga sulit sama sekali. 

Hell yeah..!!!konyol tapi mengaggumkan.

16 Oktober 2011

October 16th

I know what you thinking...yep! These flowers are so pretty like her..
But today was not pretty as well,,
Felt like thousand thunder in the daylight when she said with her beautiful smile that her boy came back to her, said much apologize with the pretty song that couldn't she ignored because she knew and I realized that she loved him more than her and I know....
DAMN!! not my day. And you are not my lady.
PHEW!!
I just let these pretty flowers hide behind my back until she took her step like a happy dancing swan left me, then I drop them.

I felt so..I don't know how to explain it.....but it's a bit hurt.

Lonely

The words I’m saying right now, I don’t know if they’ll hurt you
They’ll probably make you hate me forever
You, saying that I’m not the same as I used to be, is not completely untrue
This changed me is a stranger to myself as well
You are so kind but
That’s the way you are but oh
I don’t know I don’t know
Why I am like this
We were so in love, and you’re here now but oh
I don’t know
I want to find myself now

Baby I’m sorry, even when I’m with you, I’m Lonely
I must be lacking when it comes to love, please forgive this person horrible person I am
I’m sorry, this is your and my story
I must not be worthy of this thing called love, even though I’m by your side
Baby I’m so lonely lonely lonely lonely lonely
Baby I’m so lonely lonely lonely lonely lonely
Baby I’m so lonely lonely lonely lonely lonely
Baby I’m so lonely lonely lonely lonely lonely

You didn’t do anything wrong, I’m the strange one
It seems I’ve already been prepared long ago, for our breakup
I really wanted to treat you well, out of all the times, why is it when I’m confronted by love
I am shrinking away & am lonely endlessly
You are so kind but
That’s the way you are but oh
I don’t know I don’t know
Why I am like this
We were so in love, and you’re here now but oh
I don’t know
I want to find myself now

Baby I’m sorry, even when I’m with you, I’m Lonely
I must be lacking when it comes to love, please forgive this person horrible person I am
I’m sorry, this is your and my story
I must not be worthy of this thing called love, even though I’m by your side
Baby I’m so lonely lonely lonely lonely lonely
Baby I’m so lonely lonely lonely lonely lonely
Baby I’m so lonely lonely lonely lonely lonely
Baby I’m so lonely lonely lonely lonely lonely

Cuz I’m just another girl
This night is lonely, I
Can’t take any more, Good bye
Cuz I’m just another girl
I’m so lonely
Even though I’m by your side right now

Hari ini baru dapet terjemahan lagunya 2ne1 - Lonely...

I do love it, mostly it shows what happened between me and him even he's not my boy but he's a good friend, and it sucks when realized I'm lonely without him.

15 Oktober 2011

15 Oktober 2011

I can't fight this feeling any longer
And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow
What started out as friendship has grown stronger
I only wish I had the strength to let it show

And even as I wander I'm keeping you in sight
You're a candle in the window on a cold dark winters night
And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might

And I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I started fighting for
It's time to bring this ship into the shore
And throw away the oars
Baby, I can't fight this feeling anymore

I love this girl, a girl who can break any rules of my life about our friendship. A girl who ran trough into my heart without knocked before. I know it's wrong because we committed just to be friend but my feeling has grown stronger. 

Yesterday she came to my house with tears on her face. She said about her boy but I just heard them like blah..blah...blah because the only thing that I care was not him but her. I just really want to said to you to kicked him out of your life because he didn't deserve for you but I knew I didn't do it coz I was keeping your heart that maybe you urghh.. still had his name in your head. 

5 minutes ago she was here, was sitting next tome. I made her laugh, I made her know that world was beautiful...always although something bad happen. I really want to hug her not friendly hug...but full hug. Then her smiled before left, made some moving lips for our lunch tomorrow. 

Maybe I will give her roses or any beautiful flowers. Maybe something that will make her forget him..ah, never so excited like this. 

Just wait what happen next..

Aku akan belajar dari itu semua

Bukannya memang sudah jelas bahwa dari awal aku dan kau adalah pribadi yang berbeda. banyak sekali perbedaan yang kami miliki, dari warna kulit-ah aku tak mau terlalu di bilang rasis, hobi, agama, tempat, dan yang jelas semua perbedaan itu seperti lubang besar yang tak bisa kau dan aku tutupi. Aku masih ingat saat kau bilang kalau kau mencintai gunung daripada pantai dan lautan, itu berbanding terbalik denganku. Bagaimana kau bilang lebih baik kita bertukar tempat karena yang kau lihat di sekelilingmu hanyalah hamparan air biru dengan deburan ombak. Aku berpikr, kau tahu itu artinya kita tak akan pernah bertemu. Karena saat kau berada di hamparan lembah hijau dan pegunungan mungkin aku berada di air laut. Itu sedikit mengecewakan bagaimana tadinya aku berharap kita bisa bertemu dalam suatu keadaan kau akan melihatku, benar-benar melihatku. Keadaan dimana mungkin kau akan mendengar semua omong kosong apa yang aku pikirkan tentang dirimu. Keadaan dimana kau benar-benar terlalu dekat untuk di sentuh. Tapi semuanya pupus.

Aku ingat di hari itu negara matahari terbit di guncang gempa dan tsunami, dan aku sangat senang saat kau bilang kau benar-benar mengkhawatirkanku walau mungkin kau tahu negara itu lumayan jauh dari tempatku berada.

Aku benar-benar menyukai bagaimana cara yang tak terlihat itu telah menarikku pada suatu keadaan bahwa aku benar-benar tak bisa lepas dari tak satu haripun tak bicara padamu. Obrolan-obrolan aneh dan pertanyaan-pertanyaan konyol, semunya menyenangkan dan aku merindukannya.

Aku benci karena sekarang kita tak pernah bicara lagi, karena sebuah perbedaan yang tak bisa kita tutupi. Tentang bagaimana kau menguraikan semua ketidakjujuran dan aku keluar batas dari yang pernah kubayangkan. Kau pembohong kecil dan aku hanya si miss ingintahuterlalubanyak.

Aku benci karena tak bisa melupakan apa yang telah terjadi. Karena sesuatu yang telah terlihat itu membuatnya menjadi magnet tolol yang terus menarik pikiranku tentang dirimu.

Waktu memang tak bisa terulang dan keadaan takkan pernah bisa diperbaiki lagi.

tapi

Aku akan belajar dari itu semua.