The Main Casts of KKN

Aneh dan serba terburu-buru awalnya, seminggu selepas PPL harus kembali disibukan oleh kegiatan percobaan kampus yang disebut KKN. Tetek bengek PPL aja belum kelar masih harus mengurus kegiatan KKN, jadilah segala preparing perihal KKN terbengkalai membuat saya jadi orang yang terlihat tidak perduli sedikitpun tentang KKN-well, setengahnya memang benar.

Tidak akan membahas tentang kampus bukan juga kegiatan tentang KKN tapi ini tentang orang-orang yang telah menjadi bagian dari hidup saya selama satu bulan itu. Dalam satu atap berbagi rasa senang, sedih, emosi, romansa cinta, tawa, dan lain-lain.

Saya akan mencoba memperkenalkan mereka satu persatu dan mencoba untuk mendeskripsikan mereka dari sudut pandang saya. Punten-punten nih kalau kesindir. hahahahaha

Dimulai dari Ibu negara alias ketua kelompok 33,
1. Ice 
"She's kinda though person, emotional, and moody."

2. Yessi (Masjid)
"My roommate! she's my best friend ever!"

3. Wini
"Kecil tapi makannya banyak! jealous sometimes, hahaha. Sangat bersahabat terutama sama anak-anak."

4. Eliyah (kaos kaki edan)
"Cantik dan jago masak. Sempet salah perkiraan di awal tapi ternyata kita bisa jadi dekat."

5. Aena (Neng)
"Paling baik, a bit childish. Cutest."

6. Mely
"She's funny and nice. I like the way she talks. Boyband em! hehehe"

7. Siska
"A bit mysterious, so far she's nice enough."

8. Suci
"Kreatif...!"

9. Ditha (wong sugih)
"Kalau bicara pasti semangat :) I like the way she talks too, apalagi kalo lagi ngobrol sama teh Mely. RAME :)"

10. Mus (Muzdalifah)
"Ini orang ko bisa ya lucu banget..cara bicaranya apa adanya dan tanpa jeda."

11. Irma (Mba Ir)
"Pendiem, polos, nice."

12. Rusi (biting)
Rame nih anak ternyata, apalagi kalo ngobrol sebelum tidur."

13. Epih
"Ibu muda......"

14. ME
"Ah, masa ngomongin diri sendiri. hehehe. Komen aja deh seperti apa saya dimata kalian."

Nah...waktunya cowok-cowok bumbum nih. hahaha

15. Bang Eko
"Tempat curhat anak-anak kayaknya sekaligus orang pertama yang kena semprot perihal hal yang di curhatkan. Suka Galau masalah cewek matre."

16. Kak Oban
"Pmeikirannya nyeleneh (sakarep dewek) tapi bisa jadi penengah yang baik. Suka Galau juga di Facebook.

17. Wawan (Acang)
"Baik sih tapi.....................baik kok."

18. Firly
"Ojegnya anak-anak tah? hahahaha."

19. Dede
Boyband em! Metroseksual banget. Aduh bawel banget kalo lagi ngeluh....cakepnya ilang deh -_-. hahaha"

20. Dodi
"Misterius banget. Terakhir terungkap kalau dia galau jugaaa, hahahaha mamang Galau."

Sudah cukup. Pandangan saya tentang mereka hanya sebatas apa yang saya ungkapkan di atas. Berdasarkan apa yang saya lihat dan saya rasakan selama satu bulan itu.

Terima kasih semuanya. Terima kasih telah menjadi bagian dari memori saya.
Peace yo!

Story about Her

She was 21 yesterday, an ordinary cute chubby girl who never known how it feels like being loved by a guy. She's not looking bad in any way. She's cute but also smart, in another way be one of them is a great thing but smart and cute just make her look terrible in her crush's eyes, this guy who thinks that smart is better than combined with something called open minded than cute, one makes it complete but two just make it death. The silly thought that because he just doesn't know who is her. Mostly just because she ignores all the guys who want her because she's too wrapped up in the one -her crush- who does not. And after 6 years she plays hide and seek with her love to him. She arrived in the level -totally stupid to thinking- that she wants him for so long but he never give her any feedback. Beside she's tired too that all over her friends have boyfriend and they are keeping ask about when she will end her loneliness. 

She decided then to forget her crush, and she used all the rest of her saving to visit her aunt who live in overseas. She needed some fresh air, she needed new experience, and she needed any possibility that would come to her life in new place. Left her 6 years crush behind and took off to the land that she could find any possibility. 

So, she's 22 today, sitting on the audience bench between hundreds coloring people that have some purpose, watch their team win in the local tournament. It's her second times she watch the tournament with her aunt after 10 years. But she's feeling not sure to watch the game, she's feeling so sleepy because she stayed up along night accompany her aunt watch romantic movie, Serendipity that made her think if it's already exist or not? She's just doubt.

It's summer. All audiences seem sinking in their euphoria whatever it's for the game or for summer which means sunburn, passion, and free soul. They are just so excited. She's looking around and too tired looking for the game or even hundreds people there, it's just make her head in totally complicated feeling. Trying to move on and leave the past is not seems like easy enough. Sometimes she really wants to look to her facebook, and finding his name, and trying to make some punch lines like she uses to do to him. Stupid think that she realized for next moment so, after tell her aunt she takes her walk to the cafeteria inside the stadium, gonna find something that can chillin her mind.

She can hear that everyone is screaming out there and guessing that someone made a mistake to make some strikes and lost his last inning. She's enjoying her iced tea and decided to stay inside for awhile even she's a bit curios of the game outside. She's sitting on the small bench which is properly serve for the costumer. The benches just six and all of them are facing each other like a common bench in the park.  She's not the only one, there's an old couple 2 benches in front of her with their grandson who plays with his baseball hat with his favorite team on it.

Then she see him, sweating in his baseball suit, walking tired but not making him look less. He sits there, right on the bench in front of her. All she can do is just starring at him, captivated. She looks his face burned like tomato under the heath then she realized that he has dimple on his right cheek when he's smiling to that kid.She thinks that he's perfectly perfect, well he's brunette, has those hazel eyes, tall, tann, and all those things just make her out of her mind kinda that all her types already in that guy. Anyway she got this brave, she's smiling to him when their eyes coincidentally meet. She kinda want to try to take a chance on him, not in a bad way it's just something that she has to more acting than just planning, and take the possibility. And guess what he's smiling back to her. Now that she's feeling her face turns hot.

She's totally out of thinking. Let her wild imagination running circle then run free to the next decade she can't even reach. What if is the most trouble in her. Every things that can't be happen just make her afraid. "What if he's not......" next "What if he doesn't...." other next "What if that our differences can't be one?"...bal bla bla. She thinks too much, full of worry. She even doesn't arrive to next step, OMIGOD! he's just smiling back.

She stands up then decided to go back to the audience bench. She just afraid of something that maybe won't be happen. She takes her two steps until one voice call her back and make her stop.

That guy, she sees. Running to her with his big smile on his face.
"Hey! wait! I know it's kinda silly but it's for you." He gives her a piece of paper then put his hat on his head back.
"You can read after I go, uhm....and I really wish I can meet you after the game in the same place." half of whisper he's gone. Leaving this chubby girl with her shocking face. After she realized she hands that paper then she opens it.

 

What I have to do is dismiss you

And all those words I tried to write

And all those brave I tried to come out

And all those fears I tried to keep in

And all those things have to be nothing

Six years passed by since I met you there

You walked by in front of me and I can smell your move came down slowly

I was captivated in every corner of your voices

You were standing there and I acted stupid to catch your attention

Irritated me with your girl in every way I walked around

Here, there.

Was it romance? Or it was a girl who just too much dreaming

You are my present, and hope for a gift

You lost your girl and I ready to come in

We talk sometimes behind our sit till the night come late

Was it love? Or a girl who just to much dreaming

And I hope too much, expected more that it should be

And every word, every brave, every fear just my present

And you are not my gift.

Dismiss you is the hardest thing I’ve ever do

For this six years I’m waiting for you

For this earth that miss the rain

For all those things I’ve tried to do

Story about PPL part 2

Okay, I don't know exactly if I was embarrassed or it was just kind of her concern to me, but all I know that I was feeling so ashamed when she interrupted.

Starting when I teached about Past Continuous Tense.
I asked every student, "What was I doing at 11 pm?"
Some of them answered it right until one student answered, "You was sleeping at 11 pm."
Then I said, "OK. Your friend answered-you was sleeping ........"
Then she interrupted me, "OK listen student! What Miss. Windy said is right that 'you' is followed by was but it is used in informal situation but we are learning about formal situation. So, Miss. Windy what you said is not wrong but it's not quiet right. 'you' is followed by....'were'."

When she was talking I just really wanted say that I'm not finish yet but I didn't interrupted her because I know that I didn't have any right to interrupted her.

I wish she knew that when I said, "OK. Your friend answered-you was sleeping ........" I was not finishing yet. I would say "OK. Your friend answered-you was sleeping ........what do you think? is there something wrong about what he said? Remember that 'I' is followed by was but 'you' is followed by 'were'."

I wish that she didn't interrupted me. I wish she listened me until I finished it. I wish I have never said wish.

I didn't need to feel so ashamed in front of my student.

My positive mind told me maybe it's kind of her concern/care to me to make me became a good teacher.
Hey, mind! I wish you right. 

Story about PPL

PPL, maybe for some of you who study in educational course, this kind of thing isn't something new. We get experience, and story, and every story must be different. Mine is the complicated one, I mean, it's not always fun all the time but also bad, sick, and irritated. It sounds like I got more pain than happiness. LOL. It's not false at all.

This time, I won't share about the bad thing I got from PPL but it's just a part of story that I found. 

Well, it's about the examination of PPL. A teacher told my friend about her experience when she was PPL. She said that when exam she conspired with the students to make her looked good when she was teaching, she told about the questions to the students to make them ask her. Then I think, whatta silly her or everyone who had ever do that when PPL exam. In my head when a teacher do something like that, it means that she/he failed to be a teacher. Because when exam that teacher to be will be measured her/his ability how to be a good teacher, systematically or not. How could she/he can face the reality when she/he to be a real teacher.

What are you going to be next? What kind of teacher are you going to be? 

 Don't you think all this kind of PPL is useless?.....when you are cheating.....

Well, me nor you aren't one of them. I wish.

I'm just saying what my head think.

Distance by Christina Perri

The sun is filling up the room
And I can hear you dreaming
Do you feel the way I do right now?
I wish we would just give up
Cause the best part is falling
Call it anything but love

And I will make sure to keep my distance
Say "I love you" when you're not listening
How long can we keep this up, up, up?

And please don't stand so close to me
I'm having trouble breathing
I'm afraid of what you'll see right now
I give you everything I am
All my broken heart beats
Until I know you understand

And I will make sure to keep my distance
Say "I love you" when you're not listening
How long can we keep this up, up, up?

And I keep waiting
For you to take me
You keep waiting
To save what we have

So I'll make sure to keep my distance
Say "I love you" when you're not listening
How long can we keep this up, up, up?

Make sure to keep my distance
Say "I love you" when you're not listening
How long til we call this love, love, love? 

Ini nih salah satu lagu yang bikin Galau tapi untung saya anti Galau *plaaaakkkkkk 

We Should Met Under the Red Leaves but...

01.25 pm

Early fall, when the leaves turn into red.

Most of them will run trough it. Curse, cry, or whatever it is to make that fawkin jerk who they call boyfriend get lesson from what he's doing right in front of his girl's eyes, kissing a girl who they don't know and how slut she is in a place that should be a place where they should kiss.

But I stoned, standing between the winds fall watching them in the slow motion move make that scene recording in my mind clearly. I do not run, I do not cry, I do not curse, or even slap both of them, go ask what the hell are they doing or just say how it makes my heart hurts. 

I turn around as fast as I wink that ruin of my desire that wanna meet him so much after he spent his summer disappear in the ocean of the world sweat. 

That place should a place we meet like you said in your last mail. Does one season can change all those feelings that we built even I know it's not long, but we have each other at least three seasons and just one season can ruin everything??

I'm stupid and just run home. 

02.02 am

There should be a reason right? For all those things? All those things that I watched like in worst romantic movie.

04.45 am

I have to sleep because I know I can't handle it then in class this morning  but every time I close my eyes, that slow motion scene playing in my mind. I don't even have any delete button in my mind. I f it exist or there is someone who will sell I'm willing to buy it with the rest of my savings. 


I start to not thinking about that but my phone rings and I see his name on screen. I know I wish a reason from him but I prefer turn my phone off and try to sleep again - still with that slow motion scene playing of the rest night before sun is up. 

*to be continued*

Melati Biru ( Blue Jasmine )

Kupungut lidahku.

Dalam anak sungai yang mengalir.

Lalu aku tanam.

Pada celah rimba.

Dan aku mendengar kidung.

Sayup tertelan ombak keriput.

Dari laut menuju ke laut.

Dari karang bersentuh ke karang.

Dari nyaring suaraku ke seberang sana.

Jauh tertinggal satu kelopak melati biru.

Beralun kidung, tertelan ludah ku.



I picked up my tongue.
 
In the creek that flow.
 
Then I planted.
 
At the slit jungle.
 
And I heard the songs.
 
Waves swallowed faint wrinkles.
 
From the sea towards the sea.
 
From touching the coral reef into another.
 
 A loud voice from the other side.
 
Far behind the blue jasmine petals.
 
Roll songs which swallowing my spit.

 * taken from my sista's old diary that I found under her bed.... :D

Another Sky

It's taken on my friend's ride when the sky getting its twilight. I love do that. Catch so many sky pictures but my only one problem is the camera, it's bad anyway. But still it can't stop me to catch more.

Once more, be sensitive to all the things between us. They served a lot pretty things even you can't see it directly.

What umbrella today on our head

 what cool fan it blows our skins

 what they hide under our feet. 

Early Summer

I didn’t drove him to the airport, I even know if he didn’t like I bother the moment  with his backpack friends. Go to Barcelona is great choice in summer. I wish I could with him but Tod always tell that every year during summer he always go with his backpack friends. Although this is the third time. So, during this summer I’ll take part time job. I want fill my holiday with useful things.

11.00 am

I still remember his smell last night.  He was like a cup of hot chocolate. Even I can smell him like he were here one minute ago. It doesn’t want to go from my head.

So, last night like as usual he picked me up. We went to his house for dinner. His mother invited me.

After dinner we just sat in house terrace. He smiled to me.

“ What’s the matter?”

“ Nothing.”

“ Don’t lie..”

“ I'm just happy can be with you now,”

“ Oh Tod, can you stop praising of me. Us.”

“ No. Until one thing.”he laugh

“ What is that?”

“ I’m gone.”

“ You just going during this summer, not forever.”

“ I wish”

“ Don’t worry. Everything will be alright.”

“ Yeah. You right. What I have to worry about. Here !”

He hugged me in her chest right under his chin, so that I could hear his heart beating. I told you I could smell him,like a cup of hot chocolate in the morning. Once again,hold me tightly Tod!!!

Once week later

He called me last night after a week he didn’t tell me what he did, how his life there, last night it answered every question in my head. Do you know that I’m very miss you and so empty right here, in my heart.

He told me that Barcelona was a great country

He sent me a his picture there

He told me that he always enjoy there

He went to many places

He bought some handy crafts for me

Then

I told him that I'm fine here

I told him that our town like the same before he gone

I told him that I have summer job

It was silent for some minutes until..

He told me that he missed me more than I know..

Yeah..I do..



*to be continue*

Stick Them Back

10.03 pm

We broke up. No words he said but I knew that he wanted it. I hate this u know. I just don’t want it to be like this.. I hate the way you’ve made me feel  and I’m sick pretending that it doesn’t hurt me because it does. I thought you are different but you are same with another boy outside. Damn!
 I still remember when you sang in the spring between the grass and flowers. I remember  your face under the sun, it was sparkling like the sea. But now you left me.

1.05 am

Hold me tight Tod. I know you are not serious with you said. You did it Tod you stick the pieces of my heart  again.
Under my window you brought your guitar and sang a song for me
 I would not forget your way for  showed of feel as penitent as, did not know why but I always trust. you will always take care of me more than this. Break or at least I thought of you wish that only feel the doubt.  No words mean you only require to think of us.
I only wish to hold your hand until summer or after moment you come from your ritual summer. Annoyed sometimes during summer without you. What always you did ?
 But I understand, enough understand.
 Then he just held my hand at least until this midnight and end of this spring.

*to be continued*

Save My Life

 2 jan '09>7.30pm

I knew that was something different with Tod that night. He looked more charming whereas he just wearing jeans, red shirt, n jacket. I often saw him like that but I don't know how, he looked totally charming. What's wrong with me?

We arrived in Robin's place.Oh God! I thought that it was a younger party but it was like Robin's family party.

" It's tradition."said Robin." My family always celebrate new year with come together, and we made it after new year eve."he continue

"Why?"
" Because some members of my family like hang out with their friends in new year eve. So,my grandmother decided to made it after new year eve n that mean at the second night,"
Robin observed me.
" Is it weird ?" he asked me
" Of course not. I'm Lovin it."

Our conversation were over. Tod went to saw Robin's parents and at the same time I was looking arround.
Some people chatted, drunk, toasted barbeque, 'n some kids running arrounds made me headache. So, I decided to sat near the toaster beside robin's uncle who toasted the meats.

I don't know how, suddenly the toaster flied over me 'n almost fell on me. I just closed my eyes 'n hope that would be fine. But I didn't feel the toasted fall on me. I just heard Tod's breath in my neck. I opened my eyes. Tod on me, saved my life but his right arm burned.
Robin's family said sorry for that accident. I didn't care bout them I just want to saw Tod.

I got in the house after the doctor left. His right arm was bandage till elbow.
I hug him.

" Are you alright ?" said me worry.
" See! I can pinch your cheek."his joke.
" But you can't do something that your right hand do. It was my fault."
I wanted smiled but I instead cried
" Just for a week darlene. It's ok it will be normal then. And it's not your fault. It just accident ok? I can't forgive myself if it was you. I don't want you hurt."
" You can be my right hand if you want."
" Really?"
" So you must stay in my house for a week..."he smiled
" No problem..as long your mom at home too.."
I stopped cried' n smiled
" You know that I like see your smile better than your cry."
He hugs me deep
" By the way, thank's Tod."
" For what?"
" For safe my life again."

He smiled 'n then kissed me warmly

" Oh my God!!Tod.!your nose are bleeding!!!!"


*to be continued*

Lunch Time

First day at '09

We met in the Collin's lunch, a cafe in the corner of the street. That is one of our favorite places. Tod was reading a book when I came. He smiled at me and I smiled back at him. I sat in front of him. He stroked my cheek softly. Then he asked what I felt sleepy and want to go back sleep. I said not. How come. I missed him even just 4 hours didn't meet him. Met him was drug for me. I didn't know why?but maybe I'm addicted of him.

After two cups of latte and two plates of smoky beef had served, Tod invited me to go to his friend's new year party. Firstly I refused him because I must accomplished my paper. But he offered to help me finished my paper.

" Not for this time, Tod." I hold his hand. " You always help me to accomplished my homework. It makes me look dumb."

He just smiled.

" Ok. How if I just help you type? You know that Robin is my best friend and he will be angry if I don't come."
" Come alone is not big trouble, right?"
" It will. If u don't wanna accompany me I won't come."

His cotton compulsion made me couldn't refuse him anymore.

" But just type. Oke?!!"
" Yes ma'am"

He smiled won.

As usual he toke me home with his brown van. He drew my coat to my body. He had me to take a rest and he would picked me up at 4 o'clock for accomplished my paper in his house. Then he kissed my brow. Kind and always understand me. He is too perfect to me. ^^

*to be continue*

Note this !!

Saying sorry first which is MENGALAH bukan berarti KALAH. 

Cheers!!! \^_^/

23 Oktober 2011

I thought that love is easy but I’m wrong. I thought I can start it with every girl that I met or the girls around me but it seems that God just made me a good person enough that make me just love one person in the rest of my life. I thought that I can forget her because I knew that she doesn’t love me as a men, she just love me as a best friend.

Badly I don’t know how to erase this feeling or make myself used only with you as a friend. 

You maybe think that I’m the weirdest guy ever. I don’t mind. Because I know sometimes love makes us weird even stupid. 

So, I turned off my phone. Rode my car anywhere it brought me, unconciously came at a place with a stranger. There just a hill like floors upper the town with the lights. Such a perfect romantic place but she weren’t here. 

At that time one flash light surprised me. A girl with a polaroid in her hand smiled at me. I don’t know it would be a good sign for me or not but I didn’t want to loose any chance so, I smiled back at her. Could she change my mind?

I Know Him So Well by Susan Boyle

Nothing is so good it lasts eternally  

Perfect situations must go wrong 

But this has never yet prevented me  

Wanting far too much 

For far too long

Looking back

  I could have played it differently  

Won a few more moments 

Who can tell But it took time to understand the man 

Now at least I know I know him well
Wasn't it good? (Oh so good) 

Wasn't he fine? (Oh so fine) 

Isn't it madness He can't be mine? 

But in the end 

He needs a little bit 

More than me  

More security 

He needs his fantasy and freedom 

I know him so well

No-one in your life is with you constantly 

No-one is completely on your side  

And though I'd move my world to be with him 

Still the gap between us is too wide

 
Looking back (Looking back) 

I could have played it differently
(I could have played it some other way)

  Learned about the man 

Before I fell (I was just a little careless)  

But I was ever so much younger then (Maybe so much younger then) 

Now at least I know 

I know him well

 
Wasn't it good? (Oh so good)  

Wasn't he fine? (Oh so fine) 

Isn't it madness  

He won't be mine?

Didn't I know? 

How it would go 

  If I knew from the start 

Why am I falling apart?

Wasn't it good

  Wasn't he fine? 

Isn't it madness 

He won't be mine?

But in the end 

He needs a little bit 

More than me  

More security 

He needs his fantasy and freedom 

I know him so well 

It took time to understand him
I know him so well.

New Year 2012

Happy New Year 2012 !!

In the end of the year I felt so glad and got undescription feeling. ^_^

Let's check what I've got this year...

uhmmm...htinking

uhmmmm..thinking

I think A LOT but not very big deals, I mean like little things. 

I've got a lot, bad or good, thanks to God -Allah SWT for giving me all those things. If they were a bad things maybe I should do something better in this year that make me will get more good things. I've learned much bout yesterday so, it's time to make a new progress . I don't wanna make a checklist bout that but just let it happen and make them as my surprise as what I do. 

So, should we be a new us in the new year?? I think you knew the answer.